DYNASTY: Post-Draft Analysis for All 12 Teams (Ranked by Team Name)

The Breakfast League - Dynasty Edition - is officially founded.

Dynasty leagues are bigger, better, and simply more fun. As it should be: the enhanced commitment that comes with a dynasty league deserves all the ridiculous, insane, and downright comical fun you can get.

The redraft league knows - we have meticulous all-time records books, 11+ seasons of history, and rivalries that run deeper than the Grand Canyon. My hope is that this league is even better.

The redraft league loves to trash talk, and/or share their 'expertise' power rankings. In that spirit, here's mine - but ranked by team name. Make 'em good - they gotta last!

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12) jakellis7576 / Manager: Jake Ellis / Strategy: Building

Coming in with the weakest team name in the League ("Let's go jakellis! Let's go 7576!" just doesn't quite roll off the tongue) is Jake Ellis of Nebraska Law.

To be clear, this is not your typical 'rebuild' - many of the NFL's young stars have found themselves on this team. But with just two QBs (and one of them being Brock Purdy), this team will need a year or two more before it hits its prime. When it does? Look out. Just get a good team name to go with it. :)

11) th3pickl3nat3r / Manager: Ethan McMichael / Strategy: Entering Rebuild

Hey, at least this team name isn't "EthanMcMichael5199." Still, what is a 'picklenater?' Ethan McMichael evidently plans to show us.

There's not a lot of depth on this team, especially at the QB and RB positions. There are plenty of players, to be sure - but how many of them have a real shot at being significant? McKee backs up Hurts, Tua "CTE" Tagovailoa will no doubt retire to a nursing home in the next five years, Bryce Young is trapped in Carolina, and who knows what's going on in Cleveland.

While the RBs are better (Josh Jacobs and Bucky Irving lead the way), there aren't too many encouraging long-term options. Many players on this team will be out of the NFL in three years, and there's not enough there to win now. Ethan should be a seller at the deadline.

10) jaydough26 / Manager: Jon Dormady / Strategy: Building

This is almost as bad as just leaving your name up there as the team name - but it sounds like Play-Doh, so it's better than some.

I'm not a huge fan of the receiving corps here, but I love everything else. After Week 1, Justin Fields looks like he may actually be a good QB. Prescott is gold for fantasy, when he doesn't break an ankle. Beyond that, the RB room is young and talented. If Jon becomes competitive, it'll have to be because of JJ McCarthy and Chris Olave stepping up. Still, some more talent is needed to compete.

9) Sherman412 / Manager: Steve Sherman / Strategy: Building

The only reason this common name-and-number format makes me chuckle is because it reminds me of Finding Nemo: P Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney.

Will Steve Sherman, the 3L at Nebraska Law, have more mental ability than Dory? Well, his QB situation is not great. Behind James Cook, his RBs don't have paths to the field. But his WR room looks great: Veterans Jamarr Chase and Cordarelle Sutton find young support in Matthew Golden and Xavier Legette. Still, there's just not enough there to compete yet.

8) tory taylor mvp / Manager: Marie Ohlinger / Strategy: Win Now

This might be the best WR room in the League. But the RB room needs help: when Kamara and Jameson Williams fade into the night, the most recognizable hope is Kaleb Johnson. But without a doubt, Marie believes in her Hawkeyes (thus the team name). With her current QB situation, Marie has enough strength at wideout (and tight end, btw) to make a playoff push.

7) Children of Iluvatar / Manager: Kenneth Pancake / Strategy: Building

The team name is a reference to the deity used in J.R.R. Tolkien's writings, including "The Lord of the Rings." Nerdy? Yes. Cool? Also yes.

I hated my draft so much that I immediately traded my first-round pick (Bijan Robinson) to RJ Dechow for picks. Now that things have solidified - and I see a win on the horizon for week 1 - I like where I'm at to be competitive in a few years. I'll need one more good, long-term QB option to truly be at the top.

6) Wormwood / Manager: Jason McMichael / Strategy: Win Now

I forget why Jason named his team "Wormwood," but there was a reason behind it. It may mean that he'll be bitter about inevitably scoring the most points in a season and missing the playoffs.

Despite some concerns about RB depth, Jason's team could be absolutely scary. Derrick Henry just doesn't quit. Jalen Hurts is at the top of his game - and don't forget Barkley. The TE options are elite. Is it a little heavy on Eagles players? Sure. But the Eagles happen to be pretty good right now.

5) Werewolves of London / Manager: Al Ohlinger / Strategy: Win Now

I think the name is a reference to a song? I probably missed something there, but it's unique, and it's not based on players who come and go.

I know Al - everybody, look out. This man carries a Breakfast League championship, and his team is STRONG. The RBs are young and hungry. Two of the QBs are simply the best. There's little to complain about here.

4) Andy's Mints / Manager: Connor Gibson / Strategy: Win Now

There's no shortage of QBs here - Mahomes and Stroud lead the way, with some developing young talent on the bench. If two of those turn out, look out. While the RBs don't look as promising (older players on the way out of leading positions on their respective teams), the receiving corps looks great. I expect Connor - who won in his rookie season in the redraft league - to compete right away.

3) The Jackdaw / Manager: Sean Alumbaugh / Strategy: Building

The depth at QB is not great, but Jayden Daniels as a lead can accomplish a lot. The RB room needs more starters. And while the receiving room has some talent, there still feels like something is missing. I think there's a lot of growth needed here.

2) Penix Extension / Manager: Daren Lincourt / Strategy: Building

I don't usually like dynasty team names based on a player's name. After all, what if you trade him? That name likely won't last 20 years. And imagine if your favorite NFL team switched names every year. That would be confusing. But still, this one is pretty elite.

But Daren has bigger issues. His best QB is... Drake Maye? His RBs are concerning, after McCaffery. His WR room is well-rounded. Still, QBs are a must for this team moving forward.

1) Dan Campbell's Kneecaps / Manager: RJ Dechow / Strategy: Win Now

Great team name. The team isn't bad either. At QB, look for Jaxson Dart to get the start in New York sooner rather than later. Trading three first rounders for Bijan Robinson, it's obvious that RJ wants to win now - and he has to. Kelce's attempted murder of Zavier Worthy won't help that effort - but there's likely enough depth to put up with it.

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Welcome to the League. Buckle up, make trades, win the team name game, and tell me why I'm wrong in the comments!