Welcome to the Breakfast League 2022! In past years, I’ve meticulously given you my criteria for initial PR’s, so you should all know it by now. I like RB depth, I don’t like autodrafters. Beyond that, it’s basically if you drafted players I like. So that’s all the depth I’m going to go into. If you don’t like it, prove me wrong by winning!
Here’s me picking every game to come up with the projected records you’ll see below.
Here’s the draft order for reference (even rounds go right to left).
That’s all. With no further ado, your 2022 predictions!
12. Conner Party (Sausage Division)
Team Owner: Jared Kmieck
2021 Record: 10-6, 4th Place (Regular Season Champion)
Projected 2022 Record: 3-11 (2-4 Division)
Team MVP: Jonathan Taylor
Jared is hot off his 1st ever regular season championship and playoff appearance, but unfortunately, I’ve got Conner Party pegged to finish dead last this year. That’s what ya get for autodrafting. Like most autodrafts, the starting lineup doesn’t look that bad. And when you’ve got the autodraft first pick, at least you’ve got Jonathon Taylor. Jared will have to hope the Lamar Jackson-Mark Andrew connection is online, as those are his only QB and TE of note. Where the team falters is RB depth, with only 3 on the roster. And on the bench, all the WR’s nobody wanted and were autodrafted. There is some potential here, but I’ll need to see some more commitment from the team owner before I can move this team up the PR.
11. Make Fantasy Great Again (Sausage Division)
Team Owner: Ethan Maas
2021 Record: 4-13, 11th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 3-11 (1-5 Division)
Team MVP: Najee Harris
This is my least favorite team, but it avoids the last place prediction, because at least Ethan joined us for the draft. It was a tough year last year, but I don’t see that changing this year. Tom Brady was the 2nd QB off the board, and way too early. And while the WR1 and WR2 have talent in McLaurin and Lockett, Ethan must have forgotten to check who their QB’s were. (Wentz and Geno Smith, ouch.) Hunter Henry is bound to give you some absolute duds of weeks where the Patriots just completely ignore one aspect of offense for another. And while Najee is the Steelers’ entire offense, he’s not gonna have a lot of opportunities for TD’s unless the team around him can pick him up a little bit. I don’t see a lot of good on this team (though Nico Collins may be a sneaky good pick), which is why I’ve got them near the bottom, just like his team’s namesake.
10. San Diego State Fightin Araizas (Waffle Division)
Team Owner: Dan Jackson, Jr.
2021 Record: 7-10, 10th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 4-10 (2-4 Division)
Team MVP: Davante Adams
Having your first 5 rounds autodrafted doesn’t hurt a team as much as you think it might. Autodrafts don’t usually get terrible until the bench players. So Dan’s late arrival on Monday won’t hurt his team as much as you would think it might. It got him two studs at WR, Adams and Chase. Add in a potential steal in Michael Thomas, and this team looks set there. Where it falters is at RB, and while David Montgomery could maybe be a borderline RB1 if things go well, having the backup RB for the Browns as your RB2 is not looking great. It looks like Dan will have to hope MGIII gets more work than people are think he will in Denver. Dan has been up and down in his years in the league, and while I see some potential here, I just think the lineup is lacking compared to those ahead of him. Hopefully things will turn out better for him than Matt Araiza, who for the first time in my life I’ll say, punting is definitely not winning!
9. Kittle Bit of Chaos (Sausage Division)
Team Owner: Aaron Green
2021 Record: 5-12, 12th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 4-10 (3-3 Division)
Team MVP: Justin Herbert
Aaron started the Breakfast League season 2022 off with a bang a he completed a trade with Kaelan just minutes after the draft, trading away Cooper Kupp for Aaron Jones and Jerry Jeudy. Unfortunately, I don’t think Aaron won this trade, because I think the main thing lacking on the team is that explosive player (non-QB) who’ll get you that 20+ point week that wins you your matchup. All the WR’s/RB’s have decent floors, but both RB’s are in timeshares, and while Jerry Jeudy is talented, Russell Wilson throws the vast majority of passes to outside WR’s. Courtland Sutton is expected to fulfill that role, not Jeudy. And unfortunately, it seems like Kittle is hurt again. If any of the Chiefs on the bench have a breakout year, that could help this team down the line to cause a Kittle Bit of Chaos, but at the moment, I don’t see them making the playoffs.
8. Team Suspension (Bacon Division)
Team Owner: Kaelan Carlson
2021 Record: 10-6, 3rd Place
Projected 2022 Record: 6-8 (2-4 Division)
Team MVP: Cooper Kupp
To be honest, I never much like Kaelan’s drafts, and yet he constantly wins. That’ll probably be the case again this year, but until it happens, I’ll rank Team Suspension here. The trade with Aaron definitely helped though, as Jeudy -> Kupp is a massive upgrade at WR. Unfortunately, it was at the cost of RB depth, as Devin Singletary is probably now the RB2 , and there’s only 3 total rostered. Also, Tee Higgins was taken too high in my opinion, and unless Cincinnati breaks some records on offense this year or he takes away some receptions from Chase, there won’t be the expected return on the draft capitol. On the bright side, Carr was reunited with his college teammate in Davante Adams, and I expect them to team up for many TD’s this year. And Kaelan is an excellent manager, so I expect him to tweak the roster and eke out some more wins.
7. TeamName Redacted (Bacon Division)
Team Owner: Alex Annan
2021 Record: 9-8, 7th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 6-8 (2-4 Division)
Team MVP: Austin Ekeler
Alex was right on the cusp of making playoffs last year, but just missed out. I’ve got TeamName Redacted resigned to the same fate again this year, but it’ll be close. Ekeler and Etienne are solid options at RB, and though Mike Evans was extremely boom or bust last year, with Antonio Brown gone and Godwin hurt, he may receive a bigger target share this year. The downside is owning two Detroit receivers. While they’re both talented, you never know when Jared Goff is going to stink up the field and Detroit doesn’t score very much. And with Thielen past his prime and Bobby Trees’ disappointment last year, there’s actually concern for me WR, which is normally pretty hard to do. Luckily that’s pretty fixable throughout the year, as WR’s are easy to come by on waivers. The Bacon Division looks the most competitive this year, so the extra games against division opponents won’t do Alex any favors, and I predict he’ll just miss the playoffs again.
6. Wilson’s Cougar Hunters (Waffle Division)
Team Owner: RJ Dechow
2021 Record: 9-8, 6th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 7-7 (3-3 Division)
Team MVP: Joe Mixon
While Alex was just on the cusp of making playoffs last year, RJ was just on the right side of the line, and I’ve also got him in the same position again this year. Diggs and Pittman are great options at WR, and with the way the AFC West offenses are looking this year, I think Russell Wilson can have a career year now that he’s in Denver. RB is not as strong as the teams above in this list, but is serviceable, and there’s good depth on the bench. Jalen Tolbert is a sneaky good pick at the end of the draft. To top it all off, RJ’s got the team name of the year so far. Mrowwrrr….. With all these positive aspects, I think that Wilson’s Cougar Hunters will stalk their way into the playoffs.
5. Baker’s Dozen (Waffle Division)
Team Owner: Daren Lincourt
2021 Record: 9-8, 9th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 8-6 (3-3 Division)
Team MVP: Derrick Henry
Sadly, there’s not 13 teams in the Breakfast League, so I can’t rank Baker’s Dozen in that position. But to Daren’s benefit, I can put them much higher, and in the playoffs to boot. Henry and Akers will be studs at RB, and I think Tua’s due for a breakout season in Miami, much to Tyreek Hill’s benefit. DK Metcalf is a risky choice, given the type of work he got with Russell Wilson, who is now gone, but it could pay off big if Geno Smith is any good. Getting Aaron Rodgers cheap is great as well, because despite the new WR’s, it’s still Aaron Rodgers. With good RB depth and great starters, this is a solid team, one that I see making the playoffs.
4. It Just Means Moore (Bacon Division)
Team Owner: Kenny Pancake
2021 Record: 9-8, 5th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 9-5 (3-3 Division)
Team MVP: Christian McCaffery
Strap in Kenny, you’re in for a wild ride with CMC as any past owner can tell you. The injury scares began today, but luckily it seems like it’s a cut from a cleat and not anything serious. Still, it was smart to grab CMC’s handcuff in Foreman in the final round. Even if you’re not a believer in handcuffs (like me) this is the one player you HAVE to handcuff. Kenny is all in on the Panthers with Baker Mayfield, as DJ Moore is coming along for the ride. I’ve always been a Baker believer, and when he’s healthy with a star running back, Carolina could have a breakout year. And as much as I’m a Jalen Hurts hater as a real life QB, there’s no denying he is a good fantasy QB at least. So in the end I’ve got Kenny’s team in the playoffs, because as far as fantasy football goes, for Kenny Pancake, It Just Means Moore.
3. Koo Koo Ka Choo (Bacon Division)
Team Owner: Connor Gibson
2021 Record: 11-6, 1st Place
Projected 2022 Record: 11-3 (5-1 Division)
Team MVP: Justin Jefferson
Oh look who it is, the guy who thinks he can waltz in and just win the Breakfast League in his first year. On draft night, though Connor said that’s inaccurate. He in fact thinks he can waltz in and win TWO years in a row. And you know what? He might just be right. Were we all stupid to just let him have the Mahomes-Kelce combo, with both players at a reasonable draft price? Probably. Did he also get some solid WR’s as later picks? Of course he did. And to top it off, while there’s a bit of shakiness at RB’s, they’re still starters, and the rest of the team more than makes up for it. Behind the strength of the Chiefs homerism, I’m projecting Conner’s team to a Koo-Koo-Cool 3rd place and a playoffs berth.
2. I’m Really Feeling It! (Waffle Division)
Team Owner: Al Ohlinger
2021 Record: 8-9, 8th Place
Projected 2022 Record: 11-3 (4-2 Division)
Team MVP: Dalvin Cook
Ya’ll may be aware that I typically predict myself to finish 4th. To hell with that this year, my team is better than yours (unless you’re Sean). I’ve got the best RB trio in Cook, Elliott, and Dobbins. Sutton is going to have a breakout year with Wilson, and Joe Burrow is going to lead the league in yards and TD’s as the Bengals torch their division. You heard it here first folks – at the end of games, he’s really kneeling it! Your next draft pick – I’m really stealing it! The bars here – I’m really dealing it! The orange on my counter – I’m really peeling it. But most of all – fantasy football 2022 – I’m really feeling it!
1. Crazy Train (Sausage Division)
Team Owner: Sean Allumbaugh
2021 Record: 10-7, 2nd Place
Projected 2022 Record: 12-2 (6-0 Division)
Team MVP: D'Andre Swift
If you thought I wasn’t pumping the brakes with my teams, well, things are about to go off the rails. I’m predicting Sean’s Crazy Train to have an all time year and win the Breakfast League regular season championship. His division is paper soft besides him, and with the strength of this team combined with that Crazy train will chug along to 1st place. Anybody would be happy with a top 4 RB/WR of Swift, Edmonds, Deebo, and Mike Williams. Kyle Pitts is the number one target in Atlanta, and Mariota love to throw to the TE. Alongside the potentially top kicker and D/ST, and Kyler Murray (who hopefully did his homework), this is the best starting lineup in the league. The bench is nothing to sniff at either, with Allgier and Hamler being excellent late round pickups. All aboard! This is Sean’s season to win, and we’re just all along for the ride.
Week 1 Preview
Game of the Week
The quintessential Breakfast League rivalry to kick off the regular season begins tonight, with Kaelan’s heavy investment in the Rams. This should be a good matchup, though I’ve got Kenny taking it behind the strength of his starting RB duo.
Sean will look to justify my lofty ranking against Aaron, who while I don’t think will win this week, will keep it close. One thing’s for sure, this will be the craziest/most chaotic game of the week!
Putting myself number 2 after this week will probably look stupid. Maybe. Just gotta hope Cincinnati throws for TD’s and doesn’t run for them, as the QB vs RB matchup is usually in favor of the RB’s team.
Connor looks to start his title defense out strong vs Alex, who is hoping the Lions have a big game.
The Dan-Daren rivalry is another strong one, if more recent, and both teams look to get off to a strong start, though I favor Daren’s team in Week 1.
Look, at least one of these teams gets to start out 1-0. And the one that doesn’t, well, it could be a long year.
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