#BubbleMonday

It's not the Breakfast League if the playoffs are decided by Monday morning, now is it?

Suddenly, we find ourselves in a very odd predicament. With ONE NFL game remaining in our regular season, there are STILL four teams fighting for two playoff spots.

Brandon Gaede. RJ Dechow. Al Ohlinger. Sean Alumbaugh. Two of these gentlemen will earn back their dues tomorrow night. And two will fight for a meaningless consolation prize: fifth place.

The context for victory is very precise in this matchup. Let's take a look at the three variables we see heading into Monday night's game featuring the Kansas City Chiefs and the Los Angeles Rams.

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1) Rams RB Todd Gurley. Gurley is Alex Annan's RB1, and while Alex has already punched his ticket to the playoffs, a win over RJ Dechow gives Annan the top seed in the postseason. RJ (who has no players remaining) MUST win against Alex, and that means Gurley's score must not exceed a certain number. More on that later.

In addition, Al Ohlinger's hopes and dreams also ride on this game, and this player - Alex must win against RJ for Al to go dancing. Quite the opposite is true for Sean Alumbaugh. RJ must win against Alex for Sean to have any chance at a playoff spot. Part two of Sean's path to the playoff is right below.

2) Rams' QB Jared Goff and WR Robert Woods. There's only two people looking at these players, and it might not even matter.

This has nothing to do with winning a game, and everything to do with Points For. Sean has no hope if Alex wins against RJ. And in that case, Brandon is set to advance. But if Alex loses - Sean only has one goal, and that's to pass Brandon Gaede in the Points For statistic. This means Sean would win a tiebreaker to take the #4 seed. More on that number later.

3) The Phantom Hundredth Of a Point. Oh yes - it's possible that RJ's and Alex's score reads tied at the same number after tomorrow night's game. But that's because ESPN is stupid. Let me explain.

In our decimal league, each quarterback passing yard is worth .04 points - four hundredths of a point. But, to save the room in all their point counts, ESPN never actually shows that extra decimal spot - unless you click the quarterback's score in the fantasy app on your phone, and observe the breakdown box.

Why is this important? Because even if the score in the Annan-Dechow game reads 127 to 127, it's not a tie - someone won that game. Guaranteed. Almost.

I say 'Almost' because this assumes that Todd Gurley does not throw a pass for yards. If Gurley does the expected and doesn't pass the ball on some trick play, then there's no way for a tie to take place. But if there's a little Philly Special going on tomorrow night... things get even MORE hairy.

Here is the EXACT score of that match-up currently: Alex Annan 96.44, RJ Dechow 126.98. Save that for later. One more statistic is important with this in mind: Brandon Gaede leads Sean Alumbaugh by exactly 29.84 points for entering into the week. Save THAT for later as well.

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Was that a little too confusing? Don't worry, it was confusing for me too. Let me explain it to you a different way: considering wins, points for's, tiebreakers and even the dreaded 'tie' game... here's what has to happen for each owner involved to go dancing.

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Alex Annan - Sit there and look pretty.

Your job is done. Congratulations. Your seeding may change though - if RJ beats you in your match-up, you are the #2 seed. If you beat him, you are the #1 seed.

Kenneth Pancake - Sit there are look prettier than Alex; which, let's be honest, isn't a hard job.

Good job, me. We've done it. As with Alex though, seeding matters. An Alex win is a #2 seed. An RJ win means a #3 seed.

Al Ohlinger - LAR RB Todd Gurley must score more than 30.55 fantasy points.

This would result in a victory for Alex Annan over RJ Dechow, and that's all Al needs. 30.54 doesn't cut it - that's a tie, and Al still falls out of the top four if RJ and Alex tie.

Technically, the score 30.55 doesn't exist - it's like asking a sports better to take the over or under on a 10 1/2 point spread.

RJ Dechow - LAR RB Todd Gurley must NOT score more than 30.55 fantasy points.

In RJ's case, a tie does cut it (that would be if Gurley scored 30.54 by somehow throwing a pass). In fact, win or draw, RJ takes the #1 seed. But if Gurley succeeds and Alex wins, RJ is OUT of the playoffs.

Brandon Gaede - Preferably, LAR RB Todd Gurley should score more than 30.55 fantasy points. However, if that does not happen, LAR QB Jared Goff and LAR WR Robert Woods combined must NOT score more than 29.83 fantasy points.

If Alex wins against RJ, Brandon takes the #4 seed into the tournament. But, if RJ wins, Brandon still has a chance. As long as Sean Alumbaugh doesn't score enough points to pass Gaede in the season Points For category, Brandon is good to go. That gap is exactly 29.84 points. Since there is a QB involved, this is a practical number.

Okay, here's the thing - you're going to ask me, "Commish, what happens if the two score exactly 29.84 points?". And after hours of research, all I can tell you is... the hell if I know! I could explain how exactly the tie-breaking logic is stuck there. But suffice it to say, that's the only thing I don't know. However, if that were to happen, some unfamiliar tie-breaking process would take place, and it would involve Brandon, Sean... and Al.

From there, I have no clue. So, if somehow, some way, Goff and Woods manage to score EXACTLY 29.84 points... I don't know what to tell you. Brandon should just count on losing any tiebreaker to be safe, and hope we don't deal with that number. Phew.

Sean Alumbaugh - LAR RB Todd Gurley must NOT score more than 30.55 fantasy points. ALSO, LAR QB Jared Goff and WR Robert Woods combined MUST score 29.85 fantasy points.

Sean better hope that the Rams depend on their passing game, and that Gurley isn't involved. Not likely, but that's what has to happen. Sean must get into a position where he can best Brandon in the Points For tiebreaker.

Again, if the QB and WR score exactly 29.84 points, I don't know what to tell you. So just plan on scoring more than that. K? Thx.

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Apart from that, if I wake up Tuesday morning and the results aren't what I predicted for the corresponding scenario... I might seriously consider moving to the middle of the Amazon rain forest and never playing fantasy football again.

You all owe me a nice pumpkin pie for this one, 'cause it took some work. JK. But no, really, bring me a pie. I'm just kid - I WANT THE PIE! - Commish